Sunday, January 31, 2010

Bards Are Sexy

Dear Reader(s),

I have found a group of bards that I quite enjoy. I wish for you to know of them. Here goes:

And everyone loves madrigals. Dirty, dirty madrigals from the 1500's. Dirty, dirty, dirty:

And this is simply far too amusing to not mention it here. The actor Christopher Lee (Count Dooku/Saruman) is making a heavy/symphonic metal tribute to his ancestor, the Holy Roman Emperor Charlemagne!

Well dear Reader(s), that's all folks.

Monday, January 25, 2010


Dear Reader(s),

I know you're busy. You have lots to do - I get this. I get that. I get it. Got it. But really, you want to learn, right? Expand your horizons. Have a good time. Learn while having fun. These are good things, yes?


Come on out to the first MSCU discussion night of this semester: Misnomers of the Middle Ages! Clearihue D126, Tuesday the 26th, 7pm! It'll be AWESOME. We'll be discussing things such as peaceful Vikings, modern views of the medieval period, medieval health and medicine (or lack thereof if you so desire), was it really a "dark age," etc. Or anything else that you want to bring up! We're flexible.

You should totally come out. Gimme a visit. Go find one of my posters and I'll sign it for you. Might be worth something some day (or not).

Or the other hand, to tie you over while I finish researching my awesome article I'm writing (to be poster later today, I think!), here's a joke!

"Marrying a woman from Canada

The first man married a woman from Houston ,Texas. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning... It took a couple of days, but on the third day, he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second man married a woman from South Carolina. He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third man married a girl from CANADA. He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when he pees."


I'll do the whole "today in the past" thing later when I post my AWESOME article. I'm so hyped.


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I see you.

Peek-a-boo! Wait, did I get the order of the title and opening line mixed up? Maybe? Anyway, "I see you" is a phrase from my favourite movie of the month: Avatar. If you haven't seen it, go see it. Now. If you have seen it, go see it again. Now. Speaking of Avatar (Avatara in Sanskrit), I have found a pretty nifty article on the topic at the International Society For Krishna Conciousness website - you can view it here.

The movie was simply stunning - beauty without compare, especially in the 3D part. I have heard a lot of complaints about a lack of character development, but c'mon, it's a sci-fi/action/fantasy movie - is there even supposed to be character development? Also, it takes place over a three month period, and people don't change THAT much over that length of time. Do they? I don't. Do you? I hope you don't. I like you just the way you are, Reader(s). (Though you should comment more often! Show me some love, c'mon!)

My argument is that en lieu of character development Cameron has given us an entire ECO SYSTEM, constructed to the minute detail. Also, the social commentary/moral of the film is as subtle as a taser to the nipple. What do you mean I can't say that on the internet? Says who?!

Yes, I said taser. And there's nothing you can do about it.

"Don't tase me, bro!"
(^ Brownie points to anyone who knows this reference. ^)

I propose a challenge to you, dear Reader(s)! I'm thinking of matching up various characters from Avatar with Medieval/Antiquity figures. I think it should be amusing. Feel free to e-mail your ideas at Yeah, yeah, odd address.

On the topic of music, Alistair Kay and Ian McDougall, two of Canada's best trombonists, both of which have been lead trombone for the Boss Brass, will be playing at Hermann's Jazz Club on the 27th. It'll be AMAZING. Now, if they could get Hugh Fraser on stage as well things would be ebulliently splendiferous. Or splendiferously ebullient? Who wants to go with me? Anyone?

Now, what happened today in the past? Oh, I know! This did:

475 - Basilicus becomes Byzantine Emperor, with the coronation ceremony held in the Hebdomon palace in Constantinople.
1539 - Treaty of Toledo is signed by King Francis I of France, and the lovely Holy Roman Emperor Charles V.
1908 - A long distance radio message is sent off of the Eiffel Tower for the first time.
1915 - The United States House of Representatives rejects a proposal to give women the right to vote. How daring!
2010 - Haiti has a 7.0 Richter earthquake.

1576 - Petrus Scriverius, a Dutch writer. (I just liked his name.)
1737 - John Hancock, an American statesman.
1930 - TIM HORTON, a Canadian hockey player.
1944 - Vlastimil Hort, a Czechoslovakian chess player. Yes, chess player. Professional.
1948 - Slash Gordon, *Ahem*, Gordon Campbell, our lovely leader in the legislature.
1965 - Rob Zombie.

1519 - Maximilian I, Holy Roman Emperor.
2005 - Allessia di Matteo, first person to survive eight transplants in one surgery. Born 2003.

And that's that! I hope you enjoyed today's posting, dear Reader(s).

Sincerely, your Minister of Propaganda.

Monday, January 4, 2010


Dear Reader(s),

Well, another year is over, another year has started. Another semester begins, new classes start, and I'm back. I'm like Arnie! Or the cat in Harry S. Miller's song! Well, I know not whether to be excited for this semester or to dread it, but none-the-less I am filled with a sense of excited trepidation.

Topic change! I am filled with sorrow that one of the university's most notable Medievalists will no longer be with us come September. Dr. Kwakkel, a man of no small skill, has not had his contract renewed by the university, and this summer will be returning to Holland/Netherlands/where Dutch people live to lead a research group concentrating on Medieval manuscripts, or so I understand. I am certain this must be a dream come true for him, and I wish him the best of luck and success, but it is a major loss to the university, especially for the History and Medieval Studies departments. Especially for us medievalists. Cheers, sir.

Ah, I forgot! Silly, wicked, forgetful Zoot! I mean, me! Dear Reader(s), Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! And Cheery Festivus! All a little belated, I'm sure. I hope all your various celebrations this past month have been wondrous and wonderful and wild. Party on, rockstar(s).

I think that's about enough of that for now, time for our feature presentation:

46BC - Julius Caesar (our beloved Roman) defeats Tiberius Labienus in the Battle of Ruspina.
871CE - The Battle of Reading - Ethereld of Wessex fights, and is promptly defeated, by a Danish army invasion.
1490 - Anna of Brittany announces that all who ally themselves with the king of France will be considered guilty of an offence against the dignity of the reigning sovereign of the state, ie. her.
1493 - Christopher Columbus leaves the New World, ending his first journey.
1642 - King Charles I of England commences the slide into civil war by sending soldiers to arrest Parliament. Silly man.
1865 - The New York Stock Exchange opens its first permanent headquarters.
2010 - The Burj Khalifa, the world's tallest building, opens today!

1643 - Isaac Newton. Exciting.
1923 - Don Butterfield, an American jazz and classical tuba player.
1963 - Till Lindemann of Rammstein.

1903 - Topsy the elephant. Sad case, that.

And today is also the Eleventh Day of Christmas in Western Christianity. That's neat.

So, I hereby bid you adieu, dear Reader(s). I wish you well, and I shall babble (like a brook, see?) to you later.

P.S. Go watch Avatar.